i have been slacking on a few commitments that i have had lately. things that i should have done months ago and it has been weighing down. i was trying my best to fight through whatever it is that has been slowing me down. i have done that with little to no success, in fact i have failed miserably. i have been producing nothing but crap. it goes back to that cloud i was talking about a few post back. today i decided to change my strategy instead of trying to fight through it i have confronted it! i have been cleaning, cooking and reading books that have nothing to do with what i need to write about, oh and a little video game playing. it has been working about great! the cloud around me doesn’t seem so strong and i feel relieved enough were i know i can get back on track and focus. if i want writing to be my career i know i need to get over these little bumps a lot more quickly and calmly!!!
i’ve been having such a hard time with the human experience lately. i understand everything has it’s ups and downs and that life is in seasons. i get that nothing last forever good or bad but man i was doing so good! noting drastic has happened nothing catastrophic or world ending just i find myself in a slump. just this weird shadow over every little thing i am supposed or want to do. i have no way of self motivation out of it. so i hide away and try to do the best that i can without falling to behind. this state of being causes me to miss out on stuff, true some of the stuff i dont want to do but some of stuff could be really fun! so stay in the house and try to write. keeping up with the 30 day challenge has helped but i still just feel blah all of a sudden about everything.