Tag Archives: truth

I wrote about it

facebook status istagram post tumblr blogs and snapchat story videos

youtube shares and twitter rants i wrote about this love it seems if i tried to stop i just cant

an entire note books of poems and more than a few blogs

i try no contact but mutual friends make things hard

so i write about it people tell me to move on

so i write about her muse is so strong

so it seems that i have more than just a thing for the way that those island hips swing

it should have been just a fling just a sexual thing when i learned about her ring i should have stopped everything

we did

that didnt last long

even in denial forbidden love can be too strong

maybe some of the force was because it was so wrong

all i know is i write about it often a love i should have never had

a love i lost i should have never had

a love i lost i should have never grabbed on to

tried my hardest to hold on to

so how do i not write about it if i still long to

hold you kiss you love you

so i write about how much i miss you

so i write about how much i wish i never knew you

i write about how my heart cant seem to heal

i write about how heartache is beyond real

so i write about how low i feel

and i write

darkness becomes light and wrong is made right by the movement of my pen to paper my fingers on the keys and then i can breathe and think of good tings and hope you are happy

then i write about that

then it leads me to write about other things

so i write about it

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No safe places

there are no safe places for me

quite a revelation as america begins to celebrate black history

if i identify as straight i must hate gays

if i am proud to be black i must hate all the other false created classifications of race

if i identify as a man i must hate women

if i call myself intelligent i must hate everyone with an uneducated opinion

cant be safe at home because its the ones that look like you not the outside racist that can do the most harm

dont say you are American because that identity is just synonymous with wrong

cant call yourself black/african/colored or negro because unless someone else names the identity of your people for you that labeling is evil

cant like sports or read books because one is lame and the other is your only way out the hood and will damage your brain

cant like more than one issue/cause or thang its not like you have a multitasking brain

there are no safe places to identify as me because wherever i turn someone wants to make me ashamed of claiming my rights/my life/my name

it only seems

it seems people only pay attention to you when you are gone

only love you when they are wrong

are only around when you are strong

only acknowledge you when there is pain

only value you when there is something to gain

only apologize when they get caught

are only impressed when you are in second place

only concerned after the fears you faced

only appear after you weathered the storm

only ask how you are doing when all is gone

only find time when you need to be alone

only have an opinion until you write this poem

Today’s Date Back from Japan

WHAT’S UP PEOPLE!!!!!!

i have been gone for a little bit. Took an unexpected trip to JAPAN!!!!!!!!!! It was an almost pure last minute thing that i did not expect and i am so glad that i took the opportunity to go! My friend Alex is the one who invited me and set up the trip! (and paid for it, he is amazing) We went from Dec. 27, to Jan. 11 so we spent New Year’s and my birthday in JAPAN!!!  So having a blog most people thought oi would chronicle the experience on here and keep up a daily blog schedule but i took a different approach. one reason is because we would not always have reliable WiFi and another is because i wanted to write about what i was experiencing at the time. yes, this is writing typing on the blog but there is something so intimate about putting pen to paper and since right before i left on the trip my sisters brought me a journal i took it as the right thing to do to write what was going on down in there.

I am so glad i did. it has been a long time since i have written with a pen on a daily bases that it made the whole experience when more amazing! the mental exercise of writing without spell check and still capturing the experience of climbing two mountains and feeding deer in a Buddhist temple or just becoming infatuated with a pretty girl that you talked to for five minutes in between sight seeing. we traveled to five cities in those two weeks, Tokyo, Mt. Fuji, Kyoto, Osaka and Nara. Each city held its own style and feel plus getting to them was awesome. The public train system in Japan was so complex yet easy to navigate, the operators were beyond helpful and if you messed up they were to happy to help you with adjustments! (inside joke) THEN THERE WAS THE BULLET TRAIN! it was beyond cool and yes even with the experience of riding the monorail at Disney, noting can compare to taking the bullet train around a mountain and across half a country!

The food by the gods the food! we didnt have one bad meal while we were there and that includes the two meals we had that we got from 7-11! Yes I said 7-11!!!! everything was so fresh and even with eating noodles two or three times a day noting tasted the same and was a new, wonderful experience.

there are so many things to talk about like how we didnt see any trash on the ground for almost two weeks or how that a shrine in the middle of the day in a busy city surrounded by traffic and skyscrapers was the most quiet place i have ever been in my life! i could talk about how comic books and sex arent looked upon as something to be hidden or placed in a sub culture as if it is beneath people and scary but placed out in a manner of normality that doesnt offend anyone! i could go on for days about the comics and the diversity of the people who enjoyed them with no shame. i could begin an entire new blog post about how traditional and the latest in modern advances live side by side in harmony! I can talk for days about the women!!!! I could go on and on but i wont.

i love writing and i believe writing can be a gateway for people to leave the surroundings that they may be trapped on or take them to places that dont even exist but now i also believe that sometimes you just have to go. you just have to stop looking upon others and their experiences and have your own! THEN WRITE ABOUT THAT!

and for my black people in america, GO! GO to places outside of the states! GO to places where you may be uncomfortable! GO to places where the government actually wants you around! GO to places that you think that you can only read about! THEN WRITE ABOUT IT!

if you want to see pictures and random thoughts from or about my trip follow my social media!

instagram: bossbradley442

twitter: @DarrinBradley

tumblr: bossbradley

https://www.facebook.com/authordarrindbradley/?ref=aymt_homepage_panel

 

 

 

 

I need to write something today

i need to write today

but lets re-watch game of thrones

i need to write something today

but after i put that new YouTube video on

i need to write something today

to ward off the sadness and the depression

i need to write something today

to pay for a life i wanted to give up

i need to write something today

but you just thought about that girl you meet a few days ago and pornhub is ya best buddy

i need to write something today

to make up for all those times you had a clever line and made a facebook, twitter, instagram post instead of butting in work to make a poem to express the true complexities of what you were trying to say

i need to write something today

because you admitted that you wanted to give up on your hopes and dreams and become a wage slave

i need to write something today

because for a second the anger took control and all i wanted to do was hurt people even if they deserved it, i need to stop and take these thoughts and turn them into actions that can become the success and freedom and love that i crave

i need to write something today

to express that yes i love you, that i love the individual that is me, i love the me that my people created, that i love my people, and yes i need to say these things out loud but by all that is and i mean that by all that is, writing it down just makes it seem all the more real

i need to write something today. because if i write it down today i may just find a reason to embrace this life and want to stay

im glad i wrote something today

today’s date

i went to lay down for two seconds

for the first time today i wasnt  distracted by

tv

movies

video games

meaningless conversation

cleaning

reading

or just moving something

so i went to lay down for two seconds

and the first thoughts that came to mind was how much i want to hurt these people

i need to break out of this fucking depression and get my shit together

and to my fucking so called friends who think i need to check in on them but don’t fucking check in with me and don’t read this blog to even know half the shit im dealing with FUCK YOU!

today’s date

left my neighborhood for the first time in about 18 days

word the train for the first time in 40

saw guardians of the galaxy today

it was really good

let someone hurt my heart for the last time today

learned that someone who broke my heart a while ago has moved on while im sitting here letting someone hurt my heart

heard a funny story

heard bad news

heard some more bad news

learned robin williams died

then i came home

that was my day

Day 28. A Paragraph A Day: 30 Day Challenge

Questions from a former student of mine who is about to get married that i will now answer in paragraph form. 

Love means many things to me but it for most is means a feeling of overwhelming devotion and caring for another human being.  ( the difference between love & lust is lust is more of a physical want and desire usually devoid of an emotion connection. love has those same feelings but with empathy, kindness and respect in the forefront) the 3 biggest problems i have  faced in a relationship are lack of trust, lack of communication and cultural differences.   the 3 most important things to have to keep a relationship happy, healthy & stable for me are open and honest communication, a genuine like for that person or in better words a good friendship and economic stability.  is it more important to be single or rebound with people after a breakup is a tough question. depending on how the former relationship ended time alone to heal could be what is best for you but sometimes you really do need another person to help you get over a broken heart. you just have to be honest about a rebound situation and not to confuse it with love. when things get hard in a relationship i choose to try to fix it. all relationships are a work in progress you cant just give up at the first sign of trouble. new elements may have been added into the relationship, people also grow and change so there maybe something new for you to discover about that other person.   is intimacy & romance more important to you or communication & friendship? i left this question as is because i don’t believe that you can have one with out the other. you cant not experience true intimacy with someone if you aren’t friends first and can share your inner most thoughts with that other person and you cant be romantic if you are unable to communicate your feeling to someone or able to hear and understand theirs and what they like and desire. 

i hope this helps theoharris!!!!! 

Day 19. A Paragraph A Day: 30 Day Challenge

i have nothing to write about today. i have noting to say about people who think religious freedom only means follow what my religion says. i have nothing to say about people who compare the kidnapping of over 200 nigerian girls to a few scenes in a tv show! nothing to write concerning people who do nothing but critique but never create!!!! i dont have the words to write about how racism in all corners is unacceptable! i have nothing to say about kids killing kids on the street but our mayor is placing hundreds of millions to fix a four minute delay on a train line. i have nothing to say to those that just read the headline and think with that little information that their opinion matters. this kinda sucks because i was really enjoying this 30 day challenge and it sucks that it is broken!