Tag Archives: Wish Fulfillment

when you wish

because i was not the man she loved

i was just the man she was with

every time i held her every time we kissed

i died a little bit

knowing this was a wish that should have never came true

knowing that heartbreak could be the only out come of loving you

i embraced your laugh and i lusted for your smile

i placed you before me when knowing that this life was a lie

a pretend that had to end

a pretend that love couldn’t defy

but i wished for this

i wished for the life you had made with another

i wished that you would protect heart

we must be careful what we wish for

that wish may tear you apart

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The Proposal

They hadn’t seen each other in months. He thought this would be the perfect time. Her work took her around the world, his work kept him at home but it was ok. they spoke to each other almost every night, even with the time difference, they made sure to message or video chat with each other. when she arrived home it the house was dimly lit with the 50 or so candles that he had carefully placed to make sure it was the perfect mood, she looked perfect by candle light. It  was all hugs and kisses and thank you’s and i missed you. He had prepared her favorite meal but dinner was oddly quiet. He asked was she feeling alright and she said yes so he got up from the table, played the song they had first dance to and asked would she care to dance. She said yes.

As they danced he felt that embraced he had missed so much, smelled the perfume that made him smile and knew this was a feeling that he wanted for the rest of his life. She pulled him closer to her and placed her arms around his neck and whispered “I want you inside of me.” He squeezed her tighter and said “what else do you want from me?” She said ” I want you to love me forever.” He moved his hand from the small of her back to reach into his left pants pocket to pull out a box when she stopped him and put his arm  back around her. Then she stood on her toes and brought his ear closer to her lips, she whispered “will you marry me?” He said “Yes.”

Day 2. A Paragraph A Day: 30 Day Challenge

I know you still love me. I know you have buried that love deep, deep, deep down inside of you. I have come to tell you a promise. I promise I have the tools to find that love. I promise i will go deep, deep, deep inside of you to find that love. I will bring that love to the light of the moon, to the warmth of the sun and present it to the vastness of the oceans. I will do this  to show that I will never let go of your love again. 

thoughts while smoking a cigar 12/6/13

i am a walking contradiction/the walking dead/drowning  in air while im fishing

the son is bright but wont shine on this black skin

i gotta take a 1800 shot in the morning to stop me from mouring or u might take one shot to the dome just to stop the pain of thinking about you

before i got sick i used to love the cold now/now i cant stand outside in 20 degrees below/ is this gods way of telling me to come out of the dark/ but what other place is there when facing another broken heart

i wish i was as talented as childish gambino/and if i am who will ever get to see it though

i dont think i would have a problem selling my soul i havent had a use for it since i was twelve years old

cancer will be the last illness i get and i know i wont fight it

typing will warm these cold fingers but can it heal a fractured mind a broken heart and a weary soul

when i walk in the house i wish it was my house with my wife and my kids and that those things never belonged to someone else before me

i know i can do more but what more am i doing it for

mandela died at 90 something how man mandela’s at died at 20 something

 

i wish i had a crew like frank sinatra where i can just call them up get creative and get it poppin

its cold

 

 

An Affair

this life is almost done and i haven’t seen the sun today

this was supposed to be just fun but somehow my heart got in the way

it was just supposed to be a to numb some of the pain away

it was just supposed to be a moment until you were back in his arms again

a smile that became content

a kiss that was heaven sent

a sin no one wants to be repent

a love that was doomed with regret

i wanted it

you wanted it

we fought it

we both failed

you say yes i say no

you say no i say yes

we break up just to kiss at the end of the day

that one chance hello that introduction to get to know

nothing special it happens everyday

this was just different

you told me about him i didn’t listen

i am determined did i mention

you smiled and said the cutest ok

a lunch a kiss

a movie a kiss

a dance a kiss

i know i want this you confess its him you miss but even after that i still stay

emotions collide i know what i feel inside trust issues still couldn’t keep me away

i knew what you would choose but my heart didn’t lose not a single affection even to this day

what others think i don’t care for our moments they were not there

i can’t feel bad for this wonderful love affair

Find something better for your hands

STOP

think about it for a minute

is it worth all the tension

the punishment inflicted

self indulgence

temporary happiness

short term problem solving

i know its throbbing

cold shower

she has all the power

you just holding it in your hand

time to take a stand

keep it in your pants

yes its lust combined with love

but you cant touch her

put it away

no touch will ever be her

right hand growing the strongest

but the res of you is growing numb

no need for extra stimulus

plus that is getting boring

no adult performer

can compare to the childlike joy from her

kiss

misogyny while you massaging me

tingling when i touch you

but you’re so far away from me ‘what are my hands to do

Random quotes and oneliners

 

” I rather people hate than love me. They can easily remember that they hate you. They easily forget that they love you.”

” You want to live the life you havent earned.”

” right next to the Sun Ztu i keep a King or two.
and right next to that quotes from that Nietzsche cat
then sitting over his shoulder i keep the Bible solider
so peep my readings my ammo to give you your mental beating”

” how do you measure a man? against his greatest ambitions or his base faults”

” if i did not believe in heaven i would ask is this an angel in front og me but since i believe in heaven i thank god for sending an angel on to me”

” in you i see the heavens that will be denied to me when i die”

” you know what i like about the arrogance of the damned? they already know their damned what do they have to be humble about”

they say there is somewhere to go
they say there is someplace to see
they say there is someone i’m supposed to be

 

more wishes……

I wish biggie was alive he would have made Nas better

I wish tupac was alive he would have kept the lox from putting on those shiny leathers

i wish my grand ma was alive to remind why i have to do better

I wish she didnt have to be so strong all time

I wish i could have told her this all before she died

I wish jose was around to show me how to be a better leader

I wish wyester was here so i could tallk to her when i need her

I wish I was the son that could turn water into wine

I guess I will have to do my best to keep you all in my heart and mind.

20/20

I wish I could see you again

they way you were before you hurt me

I wish you could see me again

they way I was before I hurt you

I wish I could see you again

they way you were before trust was lost

I wish you could see me again

the way I was before lies became the norm

I wish I could see you again

they way you were before you kissed him

I wish you could see me again

they way i was before that picture with her

I wish i could see you again

before you stepped on that plane

I wish you could see me again

before my courage gave out and i decided to stay

I wish I could see you again

before he found out about you and me

I wish you could see me again

before I had put on this wedding ring

in all this wishing between you and me

after the fact always seems so 20/20